CONAN THE VALOROUS by John Maddox Roberts
Reviewed by Swiftsteel
I don?t know if anyone?s ever done this one before, so if my two-cents-worth is in any way redundant I apologize. That said though, in terms of quality TOR pastiche
Conan novels,
Valorous was always a favourite of mine. Here?s why.
Chronologically speaking the story opens somewhere between the events described in DeCamp/Carter?s
The Bloodstained God and REH?s own masterwork
The Frost Giant?s Daughter.
Following a period of extreme debauch during which he has managed to drink, wench, and gamble away his most recent fortune we find Conan in the equivalent of a $10-a-night hostel on the bad side of town in Korshemish, Koth. It is here that he is approached by a Stygian sorceress named Hathor-Ka ? a rival of Thoth-Amon?s ? and her Zuagir(???) manservant Moulay. Hathor-Ka it seems, has a mission she needs undertaken involving the delivery of a mysterious sorcerous vial and the chanting of her name three times over said vial in a mountain cave in Cimmeria by the time of the Autumnal Equinox. Of course, who better to accomplish the task than a Cimmerian!?! Having heard of the exploits of one Conan ? a Cimmerian ? her choice of employee is obvious.
Being currently down and out, Conan ? while ever wary of sorcery ? is likewise obviously only too happy at the chance to earn some more gold. Especially when the task is as simple as delivering something as innocuous as a ?mysterious sorcerous vial? to his own homeland and chanting a little mumbo-jumbo over it to boot. The catch comes of course when the manipulative sorceress tricks the hungover and greedy Conan into swearing by Crom that he will succeed in his mission no matter what, thus binding the warrior by an oath of honour to his unforgiving northern God. The only problem is that the mountain Conan must deliver the vial to is none other than Ben Morgh ? Crom?s Mount ? and a place of great superstitious dread for the Cimmerian warrior. Severely nettled at having been misled Conan nevertheless is a man of his word, and agrees to take the task on. After purchasing new gear (including a strange, possibly mystical sword) with Hathor-Ka?s gold, as well as encountering a Khitain soothsayer who might also be more than he seems, Conan heads north to Cimmeria.
At the same time as all of this is going on, a second story arc is introduced concerning the Vendhyan sorcerer Jaganath and his apprentice Gopal who are likewise intent upon reaching Ben Morgh by the time of the Autumnal Equinox. These two are apparently rivals of Hathor-Ka?s. It turns out that according to The Scrolls of Skelos (what else!?!) an event of great cosmic and sorcerous portent is due to take place during the Equinox when a new star will rise, signaling the time wherein a new ?Supreme Sorcerer? may rise to rule the world if only he/she is able to stand within the great cave of Ben Morgh at the first light of the Equinox to make sacrifice and chant the appropriate sacred words that will summon the Elder God who can grant such power. Only an ?Arrow of Indra? a magical comet which comes every ten-thousand years or so can slay such a one, thus ensuring the sorcerer in question at least a ten-thousand year tyrannical reign. Thus Hathor-Ka, Jaganath, and probably many other sorcerers in the know are suddenly very interested in reaching Ben Morgh by the time of the Equinox.
Throughout the ensuing chapters we follow the journeys of our characters as they venture north to Cimmeria. Conan takes the overland route on Hathor-Ka?s behalf encountering a brush with almost-death via a sorcerous wound, a fight with bandits, and a weird 360-degree, and IMO completely unnecessary plot turn involving a hiatus in the Border Kingdom where Conan becomes briefly embroiled in the pseudo-Saxon tribal feuds/wars of the Border Kingdomers on behalf of one Queen Aelfrith against the mad King Atzel who has encroached upon her lands and kidnapped her daughter. This is - again - an odd segue with little purpose within the context of the original plot outlined at the beginning of the novel other than to set up events pitting Conan against a giant prehistoric bull and affording him a brief ?lust interest? before continuing north into Cimmeria. With a bit of fleshing out this two-to-three-chapter mini-novel-within-the-novel could have been developed into a quite serviceable pastiche all on it?s own (actually it more or less was: see JMR?s later
Conan the Champion).
Jaganath and Gopal meanwhile board a Barachan pirate ship in Argos and head north by way of the sea to pseudo-Scandinavian Vanaheim. Along the way the reader is treated to a quite graphic and unnerving scene detailing Jaganath?s sacrifice of the entire crew to the Elder Gods of the Sea in return for what is vaguely described as greater sorcerous knowledge and power. The pair?s arrival in Vanaheim is more interesting however as we are introduced to one of the more ?likeable? Conan antagonists in the form of the warlike, proto-Norse Vanir chieftain Starkad who the Vendhyans hire to accompany them into Cimmeria on the last leg of their journey. Starkad is of course only too happy at the prospect of leading a sizeable war party into the land of his enemies, and with axes in hand, he and his Vanir sally forth with the sorcerers into Cimmeria.
By now Conan has reached Cimmeria as well. JMR does a great job here of describing a very believable and faithful-to-REH?s vision picture of the land of Conan?s birth as a cold, rocky, windswept, and barren land of mists and stone. Here we meet members of Conan?s clan ? the Canach ? including a young warrior named Chulainn who serves as something of a prot?g? to Conan for the remainder of the tale. Conan is given a less than hospitable welcome and is in fact treated with a certain disdain for leaving his people to seek such ?unmanly? things as personal glory, adventure, women, and gold. Conan is likewise reminded of how dour, sullen, and frankly?f***ing boring his own people are and is barely there five minutes before he is chomping at the bit to get his mission over with and return south again to the Hyborean Lands for more personal glory, adventure, women, and gold.
There is ? by the way ? a brief single chapter interlude around this point in the story taking place in pseudo-Egyptian Stygia wherein Hathor-Ka transports herself to the sorcerous worlds-between-the-worlds for a dialogue with rival Thoth-Amon who grants her certain occult knowledge and - unable to make the journey to Ben Morgh himself - proposes a joint ten-thousand year rule with her should her plans there take fruition. In her greed Hathor-Ka agrees, of course planning to betray Thoth, but one is left with the feeling that she has perhaps bitten off more than she can chew. He is after all, the greatest wizard of the Hyborean Age and survives to battle King Conan later on in the series. So it's obvious right here that things are not destined to go well for Hathor-Ka.
Now it turns out that all is not well in Cimmeria either. Strange things have been going on that seem to stem from within the caves of Ben Morgh. Whole clans and villages have been wiped out and the people either massacred or mysteriously disappeared. There is no evidence to suggest that traditional enemies such as the Vanir, Picts, or Hyperboreans are responsible, so a superstitious fear has begun to sweep the land. Among the missing is Chulainn?s own love, Bronwith. Undeterred by the tales and set upon completing his mission Conan sets off for Ben Morgh with only Chulainn willing to accompany him. Along the way the old Khitain soothsayer ? Cha as he is here named - mysteriously turns up, insisting upon accompanying the Cimmerians on their quest. Baffled and irritated Conan nevertheless agrees to allow the old coot along for the ride.
Upon reaching Ben Morgh, the trio enter the caves taking them deep underground where they discover that Demons have infested Crom?s Mount. In fairly graphic detail JMR describes a scene wherein Conan and Co. enter the ?Demon?s Nest? ? a Bosch/Bruegel-type nether-Hell deep within the bowels of the mountain ? where the Cimmerian captives are being tortured and tormented by the foul beings. Battle ensues and Bronwith and the others are rescued. On the way out Conan encounters Starkad and the Vanir who have likewise reached the mountain with Jaganath and Gopal in tow and even further battle takes place before the Cimmerians are able to escape the mountain.
With the ragtag survivors of the Demon?s Nest in tow, Conan, Chulainn, and Cha enter the sacred Cimmerian Field of Chiefs where the fallen Cimmerian chiefs are buried. Here they encounter a gathering of all of the Cimmerian clans, as well as a handful of Aesir allies who have gathered (much as they did decades before at Venarium) to drive out the mysterious menace within Ben Morgh. It is here that everything comes to a head: the Cimmerian clans take part ina spectacular battle against both Vanir warriors and Demons crawling out from the bowels of Ben Morgh. Conan slays Starkad and makes his way up into Crom?s great cave where he fulfills his mission. Hathor-Ka magically appears as a result of Conan?s unwitting sorcerous aid which also summons a Dark Elder God who is supposed to be the being who grants this suppsed ?ten-thousand-year reign of power? to the mage lucky enough to receive it. Jaganath and Gopal also arrive and a sorcerous battle takes place to see who will be the ?Supreme Sorcerer? who will rule for the next ten-thousand years. Here several key plot lines are brought to conclusion. For one thing, it turns out that Hathor-Ka was the one who had summoned the Demons to Ben Morgh to round up prisoners for her sacrifice. Jaganath and Gopal had likewise intended to use the Vanir for the same purpose. Both were foiled by Conan of course as the Cimmerian captives were freed and the Vanir slain cleanly on the field of battle. In the ensuing chaos the Cthuloid Dark Elder God ? a malevolent being who truly has no intention of granting anyone anything ? devours Hathor-Ka who finds to her horror that she has chanted the wrong spell (given to her of course by ol? Thoth who has obviously betrayed her). Jaganath however manages to chant the right spell and is just beginning to be imbued with new power when he is slain by Conan whose sword just so happens to have been forged ten-thousand years prior from?you guessed it?an ?Arrow of Indra?. In an admittedly cool climax, the foot of the great statue of Crom that resides within Ben Morgh then rises to grind both the dying Jaganath and the Dark Elder God into dust.
At the end of this tale of bloody sorcery both the Demons and Vanir invaders are defeated, as well as the sorcerers who would deign to use Crom's Mount for their own designs. Cha reveals himself as a sorcerer of good intent who has been subtly manipulating Conan?s efforts throughout the story, much as Thoth-Amon was apparently likewise influencing the efforts of his rivals to his own ends. Conan, disgusted as ever with the machinations of wizards leaves his own mystical blade to Chulainn and Bronwith?s unborn son and heads north with the Aesir for the promise of cleaner battle amongst the Vanir and the Hyperboreans and setting the stage for the events in Howard?s
The Frost Giants Daughter.
Overall, a very good Conan pastiche. One of the better. There is plenty of bloody conflict, gore, and sinister magic. Conan himself is portrayed as a brash, reckless, and courageous rogue full of life and vitality who as ever finds that his own lusty appetites often get him into big trouble with forces larger than he is. Nevertheless he still wins out by the strength of his own iron will, unstoppable courage, and remorseless swordarm. Supporting characters ? both good and evil ? are painted in broad, yet detailed strokes that give them immediate likeability and mark them as memorable additions to the
Conan canon. Despite the aforementioned unnecessary ?filler? plot-turn around the middle of the book the story flows well and builds up to a suitably dark and Howardian climax. Definitely a highly enjoyable and highly recommended Conan pastiche that is faithful to the character and the mythos.
Edited by Swiftsteel, 12 July 2005 - 01:52 AM.
. And second is an example of the kind of phrasing that makes DeCamp's Conan so wrong: "The queen made Chabela her slave and Conan her fancy man." Visions of Conan and the Spider God and Conan saying "forsooth" sprang into my head, bringing back painful memories.
