28 replies to this topic

[deuce]

Hung out with my grandpa (91yrs old) this afternoon. He got diagnosed with throat cancer last week. Quite optimistic, actually. His gangrenous gall bladder exploded 2yrs ago. He told my aunt he "wasn't real hungry and had a bit of pain in his side". She took him to the big hospital in Joplin and they operated immediately. 36hrs later, his heart rate was at 60 and he was flirting with the nurses.

A few weeks back, The Joplin Globe interviewed him about the Dust Bowl:


http://www.joplinglo...Dust-Bowl-years

He's the youngest of 6 siblings and two older ones are still alive. His eldest brother died at 103 years of age. A life-long rancher, my grandad quit riding horses 6yrs ago.

One of the stories I hadn't heard was that back in the early '50s, he was down in Chetopa, KS (I'm not going to link everything; feel free to google). He had land/cattle down there at the time. He stopped in at a local bar about 2pm. He didn't feel like a beer (he was there to keep a finger on the local "pulse"), so he ordered a Coke. A good-sized ol' boy came in, sat next to 'im and ordered BOTH of them a beer.

My grandad informed that individual that he wasn't in the mood for a beer. Said ol' boy quoth, "Either you'll drink it, or I'll grab your little ass [my grandpa is 5'7"] and pour it down your throat!".

My grandad backhanded him off the barstool and proceeded to kick some manners into said dumba$$ (with good Kansas cowboy boots) until the proprietress told him to leave and SHE would take care of the problem.

NOT an isolated incident, by any means. I've heard similar tales from scores of Labette County old-timers concerning my father's father.

At the age of 30 (my grandad's age, that is), my great-grandmother informed my grandpa that he couldn't live much longer, since he'd already used up FAR MORE than "nine lives". I sometimes think my own mother could've given me the same talk.

Believe me, there are far, FAR more tales of days gone by (the above is just one I hadn't heard until today) to be told. HOWEVER, this is NOT a "vanity" thread, by any means. My grandfather's been in danger of losing his life several times since I joined this fine forum; yet, I never saw the need to post about his shenanigans until now.

No, what prompted me was the realization/remembrance that Robert E. Howard ALSO sat and listened to similar tales from decades before his birth.

So, and this is most important, post on this thread tales you've heard yourself. They need to be about a primarily "rural" milieu. Wherever/whenever they are, they need to be about that transitional period (or earlier) when rural America switched from horses and steam to petroleum-fueled machinery. Got a story about WWI or the Moro Insurrection? Let's hear it.

If you have "urban" tales, feel free to start another thread (no offense, y'all).

[Aza9]

I found a pic of deuce's grandpa

[LagomorphRex]

Honestly, I can't tell you the last time an elderly person told me something which was genuinely useful or consisted of more than simply telling me how 'Entitled', 'Selfish', 'elitist', or 'lazy' I was. The other perineial favorite, is that I "spend to much time on that damned computer". The only ones worse than the so called "Greatest generation" are the bloody baby boomers.. who seemed to have had 10 kinds of fun while they were growing up.. yet get their panties in a wad whenever people younger than them do anything except serve them lattes.

[Fierro]

My maternal grandparents moved to California from North Dakota in the 1930s. My grandpa always hoped to return to the farming/ranching life. Grandma... not so much. She was a town girl, a preacher's daughter, and my grandpa's womenfolk tormented her. Day she got to the home ranch, someone tossed a dead chicken in her lap and laughed at her attempts to pluck it. She was once chased around and around an outhouse by a belligerent goat.

The move to Cali came after my great-grandfather, who had already lost an arm in a harvesting accident, fell and broke his back. Tough life, well into the 20th Century. Grandpa was a foreman on a crew building Liberty Ships in Long Beach during the war. The asbestos and a smoking habit gave him COPD, which killed him slowly. Tough man who embodied that Depression era rural ethic of making do. They had pretty good money, but he wouldn't buy a lawn mower cause he made a perfectly good one with a washing machine motor and he wouldn't buy an air conditioner cause it wasted energy.

Week he died, my grandma got AC installed in the house.

[deuce]

Honestly, I can't tell you the last time an elderly person told me something which was genuinely useful or consisted of more than simply telling me how 'Entitled', 'Selfish', 'elitist', or 'lazy' I was.

Sorry to hear that. Sounds like you're "blessed" with bored, broke-down and bitter elders.

My grandad never had time for such nonsense. He's always been too busy getting things done. Sure, he might tell someone (including myself) that they're doing something wrong/the wrong way, but it VERY rarely turns into any sort of lecture.

He doesn't like to be thought of as "old". About 2yrs since my grandma died in 2007, he's had a fine-lookin' (for her age) woman 25yrs younger coming over. He also thinks weed should be legalized so he can stop paying tax dollars to suppress its use (NO, this does NOT need to be discussed/debated; simply an example of how my grandad thinks for himself and NOT as a member of ANY "generation").

Good luck with the old-timers in your neighborhood, Rabbits.

[deuce]

My maternal grandparents moved to California from North Dakota in the 1930s. My grandpa always hoped to return to the farming/ranching life. Grandma... not so much. She was a town girl, a preacher's daughter, and my grandpa's womenfolk tormented her. Day she got to the home ranch, someone tossed a dead chicken in her lap and laughed at her attempts to pluck it. She was once chased around and around an outhouse by a belligerent goat.

The move to Cali came after my great-grandfather, who had already lost an arm in a harvesting accident, fell and broke his back. Tough life, well into the 20th Century. Grandpa was a foreman on a crew building Liberty Ships in Long Beach during the war. The asbestos and a smoking habit gave him COPD, which killed him slowly. Tough man who embodied that Depression era rural ethic of making do. They had pretty good money, but he wouldn't buy a lawn mower cause he made a perfectly good one with a washing machine motor and he wouldn't buy an air conditioner cause it wasted energy.

Week he died, my grandma got AC installed in the house.

Cool story, Fierro. Exactly what I was talking about.

Sorry to hear about your grandma's rough time. Of course, similar stories could be/have been told of country girls' travails moving to the city.

My Great-Grandma Richardson (nee' Barrett) was formidable. Tall (5'9"), lean and "tougher than any of her kids" (as my grandad repeated to me the other day). A black-haired, blue-eyed Norman-Irish girl from Missouri. Thinking on it now, Howard's description of his maternal grandmother brings my own foremother somewhat to mind. I may have to tell the story of my great-grandma and the vacuum cleaner at some point (cooler than it sounds, I swear).

[Officer Aggro]

Some of my favorite stories my grandpa used to tell me was how he and his friends used to pull pranks on Halloween, thus taking part in both the trick and treat of the holiday. I recall him telling me how one night they took apart a neighbor's wagon (the kind a horse would pull), then put it back together on top of his roof. The neighbor then woke up the next morning to find that somehow his wagon ended up on top of the house with no idea how it got there. Kids these days are only interested in treats...

[Dark Mark]

My Grandad lost his leg through gangrene and was still a happy bloke. He used to let me play with his prosthetic limb. Looking back I can't help thinking what a tough old buzzard he was.

Edited by Dark Mark, 21 August 2012 - 11:37 PM.

[deuce]

Some of my favorite stories my grandpa used to tell me was how he and his friends used to pull pranks on Halloween, thus taking part in both the trick and treat of the holiday. I recall him telling me how one night they took apart a neighbor's wagon (the kind a horse would pull), then put it back together on top of his roof. The neighbor then woke up the next morning to find that somehow his wagon ended up on top of the house with no idea how it got there. Kids these days are only interested in treats...

Hey Aggro! Is your grandpa of Scottish descent, by chance? The first recorded Halloween "tricks" I've read of go back to Scotland right after the Covenanters took over. Before that, country folk were too superstitious to pull such pranks, since REAL spirits/spooks/demons were thought to be abroad. In fact, the "cart on the barn" prank is the EXACT same one I first read about years ago. Your grandad was old-school!

Halloween pranks go back quite a ways, but going door-to-door for treats seems to be much more ancient. In fact, that and Chistmas "caroling" might have the same origin. Lots of "Christmas" traditions (as well as New Year's) appear to have their ultimate origins in Samhain/Halloween practices.

[deuce]

My Grandad lost his leg through gangrene and was still a happy bloke. He used to let me play with his prosthetic limb. Looking back I can't help thinking what a tough old buzzard he was.

Sounds like your grandad WAS a tough buzzard.

It's all in the mind-set. I keep telling myself that after each new disaster this last year and a half.

[monk]

great thread.

both my grandpas and greats had some crazy ass stories. a recent one came to light on account of one of my recent girlfriends, the age difference between us was a real bother to my mother. i had to remind her of the story of how her grandparents came together, which my dad never tired of telling to remind her- how back during the war a lot of english would send their kids out of the country, sometimes to far away convents...so here is my sicilian great grandpa who decides it is time for him to have a wife now that he won some mild success in the new world. he writes a letter to the convent from his home town, where he had dirt floors and lucky to get a rabbit from time to time, requesting if there are any young women of marriageable age in the convent and if so could they send one over to him, and in three blasts of a lupara they sent him my great grandma lol...all sight unseen...

so after that how could my mom complain lmao.

[deuce]

great thread.

both my grandpas and greats had some crazy ass stories. a recent one came to light on account of one of my recent girlfriends, the age difference between us was a real bother to my mother. i had to remind her of the story of how her grandparents came together, which my dad never tired of telling to remind her- how back during the war a lot of english would send their kids out of the country, sometimes to far away convents...so here is my sicilian great grandpa who decides it is time for him to have a wife now that he won some mild success in the new world. he writes a letter to the convent from his home town, where he had dirt floors and lucky to get a rabbit from time to time, requesting if there are any young women of marriageable age in the convent and if so could they send one over to him, and in three blasts of a lupara they sent him my great grandma lol...all sight unseen...

so after that how could my mom complain? lmao.

Monk! Way to slide it all in under the wire with the "rural Sicilian" hook.

The "age difference" thing is a product of the last 100yrs. Men can reproduce into their 60s; women into their 40s (Conan was at least 20yrs older than Zenobia in HotD).

Just to show how topsy-turvy things have gotten, there are "cougars" ( a term with connotations of "sleek" and "beautiful") and "rhinos".

I need to post the story of how my grandad and grandma met.

[deuce]

I found a pic of deuce's grandpa

Aza9, I'm not sure whether my grandad could take Alan Ladd. Both are pretty cool, though. Thanks!

[Officer Aggro]

Some of my favorite stories my grandpa used to tell me was how he and his friends used to pull pranks on Halloween, thus taking part in both the trick and treat of the holiday. I recall him telling me how one night they took apart a neighbor's wagon (the kind a horse would pull), then put it back together on top of his roof. The neighbor then woke up the next morning to find that somehow his wagon ended up on top of the house with no idea how it got there. Kids these days are only interested in treats...

Hey Aggro! Is your grandpa of Scottish descent, by chance? The first recorded Halloween "tricks" I've read of go back to Scotland right after the Covenanters took over. Before that, country folk were too superstitious to pull such pranks, since REAL spirits/spooks/demons were thought to be abroad. In fact, the "cart on the barn" prank is the EXACT same one I first read about years ago. Your grandad was old-school!

Halloween pranks go back quite a ways, but going door-to-door for treats seems to be much more ancient. In fact, that and Chistmas "caroling" might have the same origin. Lots of "Christmas" traditions (as well as New Year's) appear to have their ultimate origins in Samhain/Halloween practices.

Didn't know that about Scotland! He sure was old-school, and he was always a jokester like that. He was of Welsh decent - my great grandparents came here to the US from Wales a few years before my grandpa was born. He never said where he learned that prank, but it could very well be from his father. Wales is close enough to Scotland that I'm sure those types of pranks were widely known in the area.

As an aside, he was one of hell of an artist too: during WWII he did nose art on B-17s when he was stationed in England. My grandma still has this massive scrapbook with tons of letters and envelopes from the time that are covered with my grandpa's artwork and cartoons.

[monk]

I know I was creeping under the barb wire lol...

[deuce]

He was of Welsh decent - my great grandparents came here to the US from Wales a few years before my grandpa was born. He never said where he learned that prank, but it could very well be from his father. Wales is close enough to Scotland that I'm sure those types of pranks were widely known in the area.

Without a doubt. Good pranks know no borders! Plus, when Wales (also a Celtic country) went Methodist/Non-Conformist, much the same things would've happened as when Scotland went Presbyterian.

As an aside, he was one of hell of an artist too: during WWII he did nose art on B-17s when he was stationed in England. My grandma still has this massive scrapbook with tons of letters and envelopes from the time that are covered with my grandpa's artwork and cartoons.

VERY cool. You need to post those right here, Aggro..

On a slightly related note... A good buddy o' mine (the same one whose great-great-great grandad was shot off his own porch by Missouri Bushwhackers back in 1860)'s paternal grandfather was a tail-gunner in a bomber in the Pacific theater. There's a good story about him, but I need to recheck it.

[deuce]

I know I was creeping under the barb wire lol...

All good. More tales of Old Sicily, if you please.

BTW, I think you'd find Blood Washes Blood enjoyable/interesting.

[Kylel Ironclaw]

Not my grandfather, but my great-uncle, was in Europe during WWII. He brought back a German Luftwaffe dress sword. He never said how he got it. I always imagined it was something out of Wolfenstein.

[thatericn]

Not my grandfather, but my great-uncle, was in Europe during WWII. He brought back a German Luftwaffe dress sword. He never said how he got it. I always imagined it was something out of Wolfenstein.

My Dad had some great opportunities to bring home nice trophies from WWII, but back luck and bad information spoiled things... He got a really nice pair of binoculars and a camera from a surrendering German officer - either in the Ruhr or in Czechoslovakia. Unfortunately, in the confusion of battle, and then being hastily shipped to the Pacific, he lost track of them. Later, in the fall of '45, his unit was among the first to be on occupation duty in Japan. Many an Imperial officer's sword/katana was ruined due to a rumor that Japanese officers would keep gold and or jewels hidden inside the wrappings of their sword grips.

[Officer Aggro]

Without a doubt. Good pranks know no borders! Plus, when Wales (also a Celtic country) went Methodist/Non-Conformist, much the same things would've happened as when Scotland went Presbyterian.

My grandpa was Presbyterian all his life too. Maybe he learned the pranks from the church.

VERY cool. You need to post those right here, Aggro..

Cool, I'll do that when I get a few of them uploaded. He did a couple good sketches of my grandma at the time, so I'll include those too.